I have been asked to post my poem
Reclaiming: Recovery and Release and here it is:
Reclaiming, Recovery, Release
If the truth be told, I dropped the ball
I admit it is my fault for not paying attention to the details of my community
I admit that is my fault for not calling into question the things that are obviously going wrong in my community
I admit that I have too often turned my head when I should have looked squarely at some ridiculous activity in my neighborhood
I admit that I have driven faster when going east down Madison
when there are too the people are roaming
I admit that I shake my head in disgust when I am approached by someone that demands a quarter
I admit that I would rather forget the hood rather than remember the hood
I admit that I looked at someone that has a cigarette in one hand and an inhaler in the other and I say nothing – but I am having a full fledged riot on the inside
That is just the first step to recovery
Acceptance – so I accept that I have been half paying attention
even though I have develop the capacity to look fully engaged
So I am recovering from a lazy ass way of looking at my community
I am recovering from ignoring people that sell drugs and claim that they cannot do any better, I am recovering from stepping over trash that should be picked up, I am recovering from spending too much time talking about why something is the way that is and not about the solutions.
I am recovering the ability to dream big, love hard and care deeply.
I am recovering the ability to become more than a single flower; I think I want to bouquet of roses.
I am recovering from accepting others interpretation of how things should be or are in my community, for me and mine
I am recovering from being called shorty, sweetie, honey
I am going to help some into recovery that make an interesting comment about my ass
I am recovering from my own inconsistencies
I am recovering from a hopeless state of mind and body
I am recovering from being angry, it doesn’t suit my needs
and it tends to make me Fat
and I am recovering from being fat
not taking care of myself is a thing of the past
instead I am recovering my capacity to love
That doesn’t mean that I will be handing out money or flowers
I am handing out some truth for free
In fact I may set up a truth telling booth
at a festival see how much people can take
I am recovering from lying to you, telling you that everything is OK, FiNE AND ALRIGHT –when it is NOT
I am recovering from hiding my joy my elation and other joyous feeling cause everybody else has a stick up there ass
Its all good GOOD
I am recovering my ability to go beyond telling the truth
I can see the truth
The truth is the we are in a crisis, a global crisis, a health and economic crisis, a community crisis every kind of crisis – you name it we got it and we act like we don’t know-but we are going to recover
I am recovering from being caught up for longer than 5 minutes by anything that is silly, trivial or doesn’t pay a bill.
I am recovering from having to be finished, done, complete, perfect, correct….
I am recovering……me
Reclaim, Recovery, Release
I release,
let go of drop, kick to the curb, 86, say adios to things that hold me back
Hold back my community,
I cannot create for you
So I release you
And I ain’t got nothing but love for you – boo
and I will forever hold close to me your hopes, your dreams
those well wishes well wishes only push me forward
I release silliness, pettiness, insecurities
I release shortsightedness, indecision, I release the burden of oppression, I release a victim ideology, I release lack, I release fear, I release woundedness, I release my mother my father my boyfriends my husband and whoever and anyone that I have held in emotional prisons for too long,
I release my children, god l knows what the need the lord more than they need me
I release them not for there own good but for mine,
Cause now I know there value and I know mine
I know what it takes to fly
LD